By Baskaran Sekaran

We are all living through the stories we tell ourselves. Incoherent memories and distorted perceptual concepts of our egos. The only question is whether or not we can stand ourselves? Although most of us would never admit to self-loathing, you can always spot people who are discontent. They tend to see the negative in most of their endeavors. It got me thinking about those people who have or had the ability to change their perception of themselves.

The measure of a person’s resolve is not determined by their “willpower” but by their ability to rise above the incessant misery of moments past and consistently expand with abundant love, honor, and growth. Willpower is a term to describe how you resist cake. Rising above the voices of our minds isn’t willpower; it is self-awareness.


I want you to consider the possibility that you aren’t living in full power. You resist doing what you want to do because you have a story in your head about why you shouldn’t do it. You don’t do the things you said you were going to do because you have justifications you cling to. You aren’t in the shape you want to be in, make the money you want to make, or have as much sex as you want because of the kids, work, I AM TOO BUSY. Right?

When we take away the constraints of conventional thinking we can see deep into vast oddity. The perception of our lives is stripped away and we can function through instinctive power. We have space to see what really matters and the power to hold that space so we can expand.

When we believe our stories that we aren’t good at something or that we have no time then the idea of bad and good is blurred and a haze of indecisive pain and fear cripple our ability to want to accomplish what we really desire to do. We are anchored in the peril of the unknown and the dream of the life we want but think we cannot have it.

The truth is that we can have anything. Not only have I witnessed my mentors achieve it. I have seen my friends do it. I am also living proof. The only obstacle in our is ourselves.

We don’t invest in ourselves the way we should because we don’t believe we deserve it. There is a precedent that we were born into that conditions us to think deep down we don’t deserve to truly love ourselves. When we are young we are made to follow rules. We might not agree with these rules but if we don’t follow them we are told we are “bad.”

hmmm… Subconsciously we are taught that what we want is bad and most of us continue that thought process all of our lives.

That is the genius behind popular commodities. It preys on the vulnerability of our ego. It briefly fills the void we have within. When we buy that $800 purse or a boat we are sedating our desire to love ourselves. The levity we feel after buying something is short lived for a reason, the situation isn’t that we need more stuff. The situation is that we haven’t unconditionally accepted ourselves which means we can’t love ourselves. Which in turn means we won’t invest in ourselves.

We start comparing our lives to the lives others. Self-limiting dialogue slowly entices us into a fight between the two wolves inside of everyone. The jealous, angry, resentful, greedy, and self conscious wolf starts to get fed and the empathetic, happy, strong, and confident wolf starts to starve. Thus leading to the unfulfilled, depressed, and sedated version of yourself.

Why is it that the people at Planet Fitness don’t see results? Why do parents often become overweight? The answer to these questions might scare you. It will scare you to the point you might stop reading and unsubscribe from my blog.

I get it… I won’t be offended because I was there at one time. I refused to admit that I was telling myself stories and that is why I was unsuccessful. That is why my family never really saw the happiness we have now. That is why I made poor decisions and lost my temper a lot.

The reason people are overweight and not fulfilled is because most people are not ok. Parents a lot of times start living their lives for their kids and for work and then completely lose touch with themselves. This leads to depression. That depression expresses itself in the form of becoming overweight, angry and yelling all the time, or worse.


When you lose touch with yourself you secretly stop accepting and respecting yourself. That is when you stop investing in yourself. You stop expanding to new levels. Hence, overeating, overspending, and picking fights with your spouse.

“I don’t have time to take the weekend off and go to that course on stress relief. The family needs me. “

“Who has time or money for the gym?” I am going to get a new car instead.

“I already know how to do that… I don’t need someone to tell me.” (My favorite)


If you are honest you have used AT LEAST one of these excuses before. I know I have. It wasn’t until I hit rock bottom that I asked myself the real question. The question that changed my life forever.

What if I don’t do it?

YIKES! I was staring at some bad situations directly in the face when an opportunity fell into my lap. A VERY expensive opportunity that required me to leave my family for a whole week during a time when I shouldn’t have left….

What if I didn’t?

My life would be a completely different story now and I am willing to wager, a much worse story. There is a reason why I wanted to get real with you guys. This is the raw truth that most people are too scared to admit.

I was not ok. I was not happy.


When I admitted these truths, I was free to expand. The scary truth is that only about 1% of you will be brave enough to admit it by yourself but I hope to inspire more of you. I want to show you there is more! Life is not over. Get out of autopilot!!!!

If you are unfulfilled, unhappy, depressed, or you really want to do something that will make YOU better. Just ask yourself the magic question and if the answer is:

– Get Worse

– Stay the same

– Depression

– Anger

Then have the courage to change your path and do something to change it.

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